


and i lost you

by intheobyss



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Background Anxiety | Virgil Sanders, Hurts Like Hell by Fleurie, Not cool., Songfic, Tumblr Prompt, angst angst angst angst angst angst angst, deceit cries, do not post this fic on another site, don’t make money off of my work, if you want to post this somewhere else you need my consent, i’m talking to you fanfic pocket dude., prompt from tumblr, remus cries, that is illegal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-24
Updated: 2020-02-24
Packaged: 2021-02-27 22:53:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 496
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22873558
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/intheobyss/pseuds/intheobyss
Summary: remus is sad because he got thinkin’ bout not-resident-no-more emo.515 words of pure angst (dudes idk where those last few words went don’t ask me)songfic inspired/requested by lance-alt on tumblr (lance_alt on ao3)also by i-am-overly-complicated on tumblr
Comments: 2
Kudos: 12





	and i lost you

Remus sat alone in a dark room full of spiderwebs, real and fake. He sat on the small stair platform, gripping a picture frame so tightly that his knuckles were white.  
—  
_how can i say this without breaking  
how can i say this without taking over  
how can i put it down into words  
when it’s almost too much for my soul alone_  
—  
The picture that was kept safe inside the frame was one of three people. It was Deceit, Remus and Virgil…  
when they were all still together. When they were whole.  
—  
_i loved, and i loved and i lost you  
i loved, and i loved and i lost you_  
—  
The dark door creaked open. Remus looked up, tears shining in his eyes, threatening to spill over. Deceit, who was standing in the doorway looked at Remus and walked over to sit by him.  
—

_i loved, and i loved and i lost you_

—  
When Deceit sat down next to him, the tears that were collecting in Remus’ eyes fell down. Deceit was consoling him, also sharing his friend’s grief. Remus whispered, “ _and it hurts like hell. yeah, it hurts like hell_.”  
—  
Hours later, after they had left Virgil’s old room, Remus was staring in his mirror, where he had taped a photo of his old friend.  
—  
_i don’t want them to know the secrets  
i don’t want them to know the way i loved you  
i don’t think they’d understand it, no_  
—  
Remus looked out his grand doors, beyond his balcony to his brother’s bright side of the imagination.  
—  
_i don’t think they would accept me, no_  
—  
“ _I loved, and I loved and I lost you._ ” Remus whispered, walking towards his balcony.  
“ _I loved, and I loved, and I lost you._ ” He walked over to the railing, placing his hands on it.  
“ _I loved, and I loved and I lost you_.” Remus cried.  
“ _And it hurts like hell._ ”  
Deceit had walked in, unbeknownst to Remus, listening to Remus vent his feelings. Deceit placed a hand on Remus’ shoulder. “ _Yeah it hurts like hell._ ”  
—  
_dreams fight with machines  
inside my head like adversaries  
come wrestle me free  
clean from the war_  
—  
The two were both enclosed in another sobbing comfort session, gradually sliding down to sit on the balcony floor.  
—  
_your heart fits like a key  
into the lock on the wall_  
—  
Remus conjured the chest of abandoned things, the one that they found in Virgil’s room after he had left.  
—  
_i turn it over,  
i turn it over,  
but i can’t escape_  
—  
Remus gently lift the chest’s lid, as if it could all fall apart at a moment’s notice.  
—  
_i turn it over,  
i turn it over_  
—  
“ _i loved, and i loved, and i lost you…_ ” Remus gently cried. “ _i loved, and i loved, and i lost you. i loved and i loved, and i lost you._ ” Remus closed the lid and stood up, a dark look clouding his face. “ _and it hurts like hell._ ”

**Author's Note:**

> OH MY GOODNESS WAS THIS A PAIN TO FORMAT
> 
> had to do <> these fancy things then “em” and to end “/em” and it was a lot. not fun but totally worth it.


End file.
